What to Expect

4

When you’re expecting? No. When having laser hair removal? Yes.

 

In a word: Pain.

 

I’ve been getting laser treatments for just over a year. I decided to do it because I was very sexy and kept getting a rash and ingrown hairs on my inner thighs. Bathing suit season was awesome. I literally tried everything – creams, washes, medicines. Nothing helped. After trying all sorts of over-the-counter and prescription treatments, my dermatologist finally told me that I just needed to save up my money for laser because it was the only thing that was going to help. (It’s always very encouraging when your doctor tells you there is absolutely nothing she can do for you.) So I bit the bullet and just had it done. I really just needed my upper legs done but got suckered into the multiple body part discounts and dreams of never having to shave again, so I did it all. ALL OF IT.

 

I had no idea what to expect going into it. I thought I’d get into what I imagined to be a tanning bed, hang out leisurely in there for about an hour, and be hair-free. Sike. It ends up being a minimum of 5 sessions per area, and you have to wait 4-6 weeks in between treatments to allow time for the hair follicle to shrink and fall out. Your skin looks pretty gross after those first couple of treatments as the follicle swells up. I actually had an increase in ingrown hairs initially, and my skin was very sensitive and irritated for the first few days after each session. And then you hear all those commercials on the radio for pain-free laser and Gentlelase. It’s all lies. You are getting zapped with a laser for crying out loud. How could that possibly be painless? For my very first treatment, I got my upper legs and bikini area done. The whole bikini. I wanted to die. Imagine being stung by a thousand bees in the most sensitive place on your body. It was pretty much the worst pain ever in my life. Worse than getting a tattoo. It’s been a long time since it happened, but I think it was also probably worse than when I broke my elbow…in the funny bone. It’s probably less painful than an unanesthetized amputation. Having never been an amputee myself, I can’t say for certain.

 

Anyway, I went for what will hopefully be my last upper leg treatment last night. (I finished my bikini a few months ago, thank the sweet baby Jesus.) Each time I go in, I always hope that my nerves have died since the last treatment and I won’t feel anything. This has never happened. Last night was no exception. As far as sensitive areas go, the upper leg is the least so of what I’ve had done (probably thanks to all that thigh meat). Still, I spent my 25-minute session breathing in short gasps and wiping my sweaty palms on the stylish paper robe they gave me to wear. When it was finally over, I had to peel myself off of the table.

 

So, is it worth it? Hell yes. Though I’m fair and blonde, most of my body hair is on the darker side. It also grows very quickly. I used to get 5 o’clock shadow on my legs and had to shave every day if I wanted to be smooth. Now, I might shave once a week if I feel like being fully groomed, though what hair does grow in is fine, soft, and hard to see. When I do shave, it’s kind of a joke. There’s barely anything there, and it takes about 2 minutes to do both full legs. And the ingrown hairs on my inner things are completely gone, including the scarring and dark marks I had accumulated over the nearly 2 years I was struggling with my skin. So I will suck it up and take it like a man through any remaining maintenance treatments. I will be strong and tough. I will do my hairless duty.

 

Dana: 1; Laser Hair Removal: 0

 

  1. 4 Comments
  2. Asia
    May 7, 2014 at 5:31 pm

    I can totally relate to this. I’m doing laser treatment on my upper lip, jaw line, cheeks, side burns and neck and each treatment is worse than before. One time I came out hot, sweaty and in tears! However I would change my decision to do it because the results are phenomenal! No more five o’clock shadows! I next want to do my underarms but now that I know what to expect I’m hesitant to proceed LOL. Thanks for sharing!

     
  3. Asia
    May 7, 2014 at 5:31 pm

    I can totally relate to this. I’m doing laser treatment on my upper lip, jaw line, cheeks, side burns and neck and each treatment is worse than before. One time I came out hot, sweaty and in tears! However I would not change my decision to do it because the results are phenomenal! No more five o’clock shadows! I next want to do my underarms but now that I know what to expect I’m hesitant to proceed LOL. Thanks for sharing!

     
  4. Amy
    May 13, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    Did you delete your poop post?

     
    • Dana Bobik
      May 14, 2014 at 11:54 am

      Nope, it’s still there. The server went down briefly, so it might have disappeared for a bit. I may be slightly embarrassed by some of my TMI, but once it’s up, it’s up for good. 🙂

       
 
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