I got my first personal laptop yesterday! A refurbished MacBook Air. It felt like Christmas when the package arrived. I couldn’t wait to get it open and start playing. My first challenge was trying to get the clock set to Eastern Time. You have to do this through Location Settings, which is non-intuitively housed in Security and Privacy. I had to call in the big guns on that one (aka, Chris). I then spent about an hour trying to reformat some pictures on the blog, got frustrated when I couldn’t get them to line up properly, yelled at Chris for trying to help me, and then started crying. I decided to lock myself in the bedroom for a little while to calm down and reflect on my overly emotional state. In my self-reflection, I realized that this is about the time I should be PMS-y and emotional. That made me even more sad. And then the tears really started. I allowed myself a few good sobs, got myself together, and then went into the living room to apologize. Chris, the lovely man that he is, hugged me and kissed my head. He even graciously acknowledged that I haven’t had an incoherent emotional outburst “in a while,” so he was basically giving me a pass and just recognizing that it wasn’t my best day. Lola must have sensed my distress because she came in and cuddled with us on the couch. Gizmo, per usual, chose to ignore everyone and lay in his bed in the other room. I can’t say I blame him. I then had some ice cream, watched The 40-Year-Old Virgin, and attempted to call it a night. (Incidentally, Jonah Hill is in that movie for about 30 seconds as an odd-ball kid who tries to buy platform disco sparkle boots from a store that only sells items on eBay. And now he’s a 2-time Academy Award Nominee. Amazing.)
Just as I was finally getting settled, my mom called to tell me that one of my parents’ dogs was diagnosed with canine lymphoma and may need to be put down. I guess it’s a good thing I had already exercised my tear ducts, because I was ready for round 2. This dog is the same age as Gizmo and so sweet. He’s been a good companion for my Dad in the last couple of years of his retirement. After talking with both of my parents and making sure they were okay, I proceeded to cry myself to sleep.
This morning, I sat down with some new reading we’re doing in my small group. The book is Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. It’s designed to be a daily reading of short paragraphs derived from a few Bible passages but written as though God is speaking directly to the reader. What stood out for me today was this statement. “I understand human frailty, and I know that you can bear the weight of only one day at a time.” So, today, I will accept that I’m probably going to get my period and face another month of planning and stress and that my parents will probably lose their sweet dog, both in the very near future. And it will be okay because I can handle it for this one day. And tomorrow will be a new day.