Let’s be honest. 2014 was not my year. Yes, there were good things. Our marriage has gotten stronger. Significant progress has been made on our house. We’ve gone on some fun trips. We’ve been there as friends got married. I saw the birth of a precious niece and nephew. But the one thing I truly want to complete my life has not come to pass. So, in all of those good things, there has been a little bit (sometimes a lot) of pain.
On this New Year’s Eve, as many people prepare to celebrate, I’m just thankful that 2014 is coming to an end. Normally, we’d be preparing for our own party, excited to go out and dance and have fun. I don’t feel much like celebrating this year. An entire year of my life has gone by, and what I remember most is schedules, doctors, planning, stress, and disappointment. I’m tired and emotional and sad. I’m not sure I’ll make it until midnight to see the new year begin, and that’s okay with me. I don’t have a burning desire to see this particular friend off. I’m looking forward to waking up tomorrow to a new year that will hopefully be filled with joy and peace and that is, well, just new.
2015 holds the promise of dreams fulfilled. Next week, we start infertility treatments. We have a plan and a real chance to start a family. There is encouragement in that. We will move into our house in February. Finally, we will see all of our hard work (mostly Chris’s) pay off. We can start fresh in a place that is uniquely our own. That’s pretty incredible.
So peace out, 2014. Thanks for the challenges that I know I’ll realize one day have made me a better person. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out. Come on, 2015. You’re mine.